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Some fiancees think they might want to get married, but are not 100% certain, and need more time to get to know each other or to adjust to the new country. The fiancee may qualify for a visitor visa if the intention is not to get married in the USA (but to come and go and get married in another country, to return again on an immigrant visa). However, by applying for a K-1, the foreign fiancee may be much more open about their intentions since the purpose of the visa is to allow a foreign citizen to remain in the United States for 90 days to get married, with the idea of living and working legally after marriage. If the intent to marry is made clear enough, and something does happen that makes the couple decide not to marry, then the fiancee may leave the country without repercussions. However, in the case that the couple marry after entry on another type of temporary visa, there are some penalties under the law. In many cases the marriage will be upheld and immigrant status granted to the foreign spouse, but sometimes the foreign spouse risks being deported. Limitations have also been put into place to discourage marriage by visitors on other visas. For example, a K1 visa may not be issued to a recent student visitor (to discourage foreigners being students merely for the purpose of meeting US spouses). Though the K1 visa may take more time in planning, it minimizes risks that wedding plans will be scuttled at the last moment by a denial of admission.
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Courting is far more indirect in Philippine culture than in most Western societies. Philippine relationships pass in several stages, usually lasting for a long period of time. An engagement, for example, often lasts for several years and as far as marriage is concerned, it is viewed as a lifetime commitment.
Often the starting point of a relationship is a friendly date. The couple will go out together in public places as friends only and will be accompanied by other friends. During this stage of courting there will be no public displays of affection, the man has to be discreet and friendly or he will be accused of being too arrogant. It is too early for kissing or holding hands at this point.
That is the second stage of Filipina courtship and now couples may go out together without the company of their friends. Again, the keyword here is “discreetly”.
Filipinas cannot afford to be fast, they are expected to be pakipot (hard to get) because it is seen as an appropriate behavior when they are courted. A Philippine girl never shows her admirer that she is also in love with him immediately.
Playing hard to get is one way by which the Filipina can measure the sincerity of the man interested in her. It also lets her show the man that he has to work hard to win her love. Some courtships may last for years before the woman accepts her admirer’s love and they become magkasintahan, a term for boyfriend-girlfriend.
After some time the couple may decide to come out in the open about their romance. At this time they will inform their family and friends about their relationship. Every man who wants to be taken seriously by a Filipina is obliged to visit her family and introduce himself formally to her parents. It is rather inappropriate to court a Philippine girl and formalize the relationship without informing the girl’s parents.
There is a tacit rule here that says: “When courting the filipina you are not courting just her, you are courting the entire family”. Following this rule will help you earn her respect by entrusting her family with high regard.
There are certain traditions that have to be observed when visiting the Asians family. For example, if the man wants to be acceptable to the girl’s family, he has to give small gifts (pasalubong) every time he drops by her family's house. If you have any questions regarding which traditions you should observe, you may discuss them with the older siblings. Engagement and Marriage
After being a couple with your Filipina for quite a time and decide to get married, the first thing you should do is pamanhikan (ask the girl’s parents for her hand).
When courting a Filipina you will find that she is shy and reserved even when holding great feelings for you. This is a part of her culture and even for a Western man there is no way around that. You should treat your Filipina with respect, lead the courtship with your heart and you may find a lifetime partner that will enrich your life as you have never imagined.
Some fiancees think they might want to get married, but are not 100% certain, and need more time to get to know each other or to adjust to the new country. The fiancee may qualify for a visitor visa if the intention is not to get married in the USA (but to come and go and get married in another country, to return again on an immigrant visa). However, by applying for a K-1, the foreign fiancee may be much more open about their intentions since the purpose of the visa is to allow a foreign citizen to remain in the United States for 90 days to get married, with the idea of living and working legally after marriage. If the intent to marry is made clear enough, and something does happen that makes the couple decide not to marry, then the fiancee may leave the country without repercussions. However, in the case that the couple marry after entry on another type of temporary visa, there are some penalties under the law. In many cases the marriage will be upheld and immigrant status granted to the foreign spouse, but sometimes the foreign spouse risks being deported. Limitations have also been put into place to discourage marriage by visitors on other visas. For example, a K1 visa may not be issued to a recent student visitor (to discourage foreigners being students merely for the purpose of meeting US spouses). Though the K1 visa may take more time in planning, it minimizes risks that wedding plans will be scuttled at the last moment by a denial of admission.
